HOW TO TACKLE AND BEAT STRESS AND WORRIES
How to tackle stress and worries for good
Stress and worries age you. They reduce your quality of life. They put you in a position where you are not able to actively attend to what is in front of you.
The subconscious mind
I have alluded to the idea that the subconscious mind plays a significant role in our adulthood. Patterns, themes, aversions that were modeled to us or even experienced in our childhood stick with us. It is the foundational build.
The first step into rewriting these themes is bringing awareness to them. For example, I always had a money scarcity mindset because that’s how I saw money being handled when I was a child. Another example is that your mom would leave you unexpectedly, and you would be scared and upset until she returned. Now in adulthood, you may cling onto your partner or protest when you sense that they may leave.
Rewriting this idea
Bringing awareness to your thought patterns is a feat in itself. The more you take note of where you sense anxiety, stress, or see that your heart rate is going up, the more you can tie those sensations to thoughts.
Following that point, recognize that you do not have to be those thoughts. Those thoughts do not have to be your reality. It is the brain coming to conclusions. It is the brain engaging in the processes that it has always known how to.
Deciding that you want to be happy
I started reading “The Untethered Soul,” and the author states “realize that you have one choice.” People burden thsemvelves with so many choices. (The indecisve side of me felt seen at this point). There’s only one question: do you or do you not want to be happy?
Think of when things are going your way. You had a good call, you got your half price coffee, you beat rush hour. You could not be happier. All of a sudden, you see a bill that was double what you anticipated. This ruined your day, because you let it. Things will not always be in your control. What you can do is be happy regardless of what happens. Enjoy and learn from your experience. I think of the time I was that person with the bill that was double the price you thought it’d be. As much as it sucks, I laughed and learned from that mistake. There is so much more to life.
It is not easy to choose to be happy. I hear from my melodramatic side at least once a day. What I do is I examine where it’s coming from. I sit with it for a second, and then I let it pass.
You’re floating in empty space in a universe that goes on forever. If you have the be here, at least enjoy the experience!
Using your energies
Choose to be happy and let go of the part of you that causes melodrama. I think of all the things that I am passionate about and bring me joy. I see just how much more energy I get from these thoughts. This is my heart being about, as the author describes. He mentioned that to stay happy, you must not close your heart.
Refusing to close your heart is much easier said than done. I am still fine tuning this skill. I tell myself that no matter what happens, my heart will stay open. I tell myself affirmations during difficult periods, including “I embrace all situations with love” or “I embrace all situations with curiosity.” I sometimes even picture the person who may be causing me stress as a small child as they do not know any better.
During these times, I try to stay centered, grounded, and disciplined. I go back to my breath if something is stresses me out. I work on meditation to strengthen my center of consciousness to remain open.
This is sounding very hippy-dippy, but I would rather choose to believe it than be feeling the physical outcomes of burnout and stress!
Stress is caused by pushing back events
It is typical to resist what you do not like, as I mentioned. People do not want anything affecting what’s inside. That is what you are resisting. The author of “The Untethered Soul” mentioned that the situation does not stop at the sensory processing, it goes through your heart (for you non-believers, just hang in there with me). Think about how you start getting clenched up or grinding your teeth. That is the physical sensation arising from how you view the situation.
When you resist, the energy just gets pushed down deep inside of you. Think of that one person who keeps rubbing you the wrong way, and it just compiles and gets worse and worse until you might lash out at them one day. This applies to situations, too. It can be innocuous at first until you explode or experience burnout.
The author uses an example of being afraid of dogs. One day, you realize that other people are not afraid. Since you were afraid all your life, you suffered when others did not. Think about how much of your time and energy is wasted on this.
The outcome of allowing things to naturally occur
It is not just about dogs. When you learn to surrender and relax through the fear, it changes everything. You learn to work through things when you are disturbed. You can tackle your challenges and stressors by dealing what’s in front of you but maintaining a state of relaxation. You do not have to put negative emotions, fear, or stress tied to it. You can see it was a task, stay open and warm while you complete it, and allow it to pass. You do not have to reflect on it anymore.
Everything becomes more clear without tension or problems. There is so much more you can achieve when you are not wasting energy and are being fully present to your goals and values.
Take the light and let go of your resistance. See that daily work is fun! You are just a person playing a game in the world. Let energy flow through your day. Once the energies pass through you, you’ll see what is left. What passion you have. All the talents that have been untapped and you did not even realize you knew existed. I think of letting go of the stress of my old job and my health, and how letting that energy flow led me to my love for writing.
Life is giving you a gift. See these events as exciting, challenging, and a facilitator for growth.
I encourage you to try and see stress in this new light. There is so much beauty to it.
Affirmations:
I keep my heart open, and I allow energies to pass through me.
I flow through life with ease.
Everything happiness for my greatest good.
I embrace all situations with love and curiosity.
